About a month or so ago I found out that my grandmother was sick. At the time we did not know what was wrong with her, but she seemed to think this was the end for her. They told me she was tired and was ready to move on.
This was something I was not expecting to hear from her. Over the past couple of trips I had started to notice her aging more than she had before. I had a lingering feeling that one day I would have to say goodbye. However, it wasn’t until I heard what she said to my sister that it actually hit me.
I am going to miss her. Now, I can’t say that I am very close to her. Since my Spanish isn’t the greatest, we don’t talk much.
When I see her it’s for a few hours each trip. She greets me with a smile and asks me about the rest of the family. She never asks me about my life or what I am doing. She loves to cook for me, and I definitely enjoy her food. It’s so simple and in some ways so meaningful.
It’s not talking, it’s not judging, it’s not questioning. It’s just being together.
I’m not exactly sure why this is affecting me this much. I’ve had other grandmothers whom I loved pass away, and I didn’t feel like this. I don’t think I was that close to them either. Maybe it’s because without her I would not be sitting here in my sister’s house.
I don’t think I can put into words what she means to me and how I feel about her. All I can say is that she never gave up on me and because of her hard work I have had so many happy memories.
She is doing much better now, but I know that one day I will have to say goodbye. Hearing those words was a wake up call in some way. I suddenly knew that each time I see her it might be the last. It’s a little sad to think about, but from now on I will appreciate so much more every moment I get to spend with her.